I know you asked for cooking advice, not relationship advice, but I've
got to say that I found your post rather disturbing. In fact, I was
tempted to check the date to ensure that it was a message from 1998, not
1958! My questions to you (since you brought all this up):
1) How have you and Brian managed to eat together up till now? Haven't
you both eaten the things that pleased you? Why must that change because
you are getting married?
2) Why does your husband-to-be *expect* (your word) you to do all the
cooking and to cater only to his diet? Why can't you share the cooking?
Why can't he cook vegetarian dishes for you?
3) You say if he knows food has no fat in it, he'll refuse to eat it
(without tasting it). If someone reacted that way to my cooking, I'd be
hurt. Is he always so closed-minded and stubborn? Is that how he reacts
to everything that isn't exactly his way?
4) You seem to want us to tell you it is ok to lie to him about the food
that you plan to put on his plate. Dear, if you can't even discuss FOOD
with this guy honestly, how will you be able to talk about the real
issues that come up in relationships? Two people in a committed
relationship will always have conflicts. Are you going to deal with all
of them by deceiving and lying to your husband?
I think it is bizarre to plan for a life together by preparing a bunch of
lies, or subjects you deem appropriate to lie about. Have you even
discussed these food issues with him? Where are the honesty and sharing
in your relationship?
I am not a marriage counselor, but it might do you both some good to seek
counselling before you marry. It sounds like you two have some very
basic communication issues, and that certainly doesn't bode well for a
long and happy relationship.
Wishing you all the best,
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