Date: Wed, 9 Jul 1997 10:18:44 -0700
From: Sylvia Genders LeReverend (email@example.com)
Here's an article I wrote on seitan a while back...
First, in your dutch oven or soup pot, put and bring to a boil:
6 c. water
1/2 c. soy sauce
1 onion, sliced
2 cloves garlic, minced
2 bay leaves
pepper to taste
Then, and THIS IS IMPORTANT, measure your little bag of gluten flour
(1 to 1-1/2 c.), then put it in a mixing bowl (wider is better than
deep). To the flour add and mix very well:
2 T. nutritional (good-tasting) yeast flakes
2 T. wheat flour
1/2 t. onion powder
1/4 t. garlic powder
Measure out the same amount of tasty stock and add it to the gluten
flour, mixing very quickly. It will turn into a rubbery sponge faster
than you would believe. Then oil up your hands and knead it for five
minutes (HA! and CURSES! you will think, but play along
anyway. Daydream about handsome Greek divers diving for sponges of the
coast of sunny Greece. Get wicked!).
Tear the sponge into three balls (imagining what you will), and put
them in the now rolly-boiling stock. Cover the pot and turn the heat
to simmer. Set your timer to 55 minutes, and pour yourself a glass of
wine before cleaning up the mess. Take a bubble bath.
When cool, put the now monster balls into appropriate plastic
containers, and cover them with the stock that's left. Freeze two
(unless you will be cooking for a crowd).
Slice for phoney Swiss steak, and simmer the slices in the tomato
sauce for a while. Grate it for spaghetti sauce. Tear it into
oyster-like shreds for stir fry, or simmer in vegetarian gravy for hot
open-face sandwiches. Not bad braised in barbeque sauce and served
over rice, either. Best of all, glue shreds to your kid's face and
send them out to the garage to surprise their dad with a coffee.
(Okay, so save that one for Halloween - When the kids asks "But Mom,
what am I?", just tell them they're the creeping crud, and "it creeps,
all over you!" while making claw-like gestures at them and sprinkling
oatmeal in their freshly gelled hair for a final touch).
Thanks (apologies?) to "Table For Two", a lovely little book for
vegans I just happened to find at the Cookbook Store in Toronto last